Working Girl

I guess this is sort of a pic of the day thing. I haven't blogged as much because, well I'm living full-time so I haven't had as much to discuss. Or have I? I will take more pics of me and post them here. 

I was too terrified to go to work for the first two days. My experience being stared at by families in a Subway restaurant left me so rattled that I didn't leave my house. Once the time off became unpaid I didn't have a choice. I trudged on to work with a shaky step. Many of my coworkers are supportive friends, and they continued to be so. Some unlikely coworkers were plentiful with their praise and support as well. Allies in all sorts of places. Still, I was afraid to be in elevators, hallways, the parking lot, and the cafeteria the building and all the tenants share. I am still afraid of strangers.

A dear friend hypnotized me so I would feel less anxiety. I would only notice the smiling faces, he suggested. Let the grumpy staring people be forgotten in the fog of no thoughts. Bimbo magic.

It works. I went in the next day, and each day since, becoming increasingly comfortable and noticing fewer and fewer stares. In fact I had to ask reception how many people were on vacation, because it honestly seems to me that about 30 of our 104 people are at work. The other cubicles are empty. Reception confirmed what I already sort of knew: everyone was at work, I just couldn't see them because of their stares.

Now a week later I sit in the cafeteria downstairs. I don't go down with the lunch rush, but this is 3pm.