Crossdreaming of a Better World

I am wondering why you focus on the crossdreamer term. It is relatively new and that community is still settling. There has been discussion by a small number of folks who are pushing the fetish theory very hard, but they seem to be being told off. I just hate to see a term floated and embraced initially by folks who are not in the fetish theory camp lose it's intended meaning because of a few bad apples.

Crossdreaming to my knowledge does not in any way mean that being transgender is a fetish, there just happen to be fetish theory folks operating in the crossdreaming space. Crossdreaming was intended as a term for folk who have trans feelings but feel that medical intervention or other physical expression of their feelings was not appropriate for them. Folks in that category have generally not been welcome to discuss their feeling in trans identified spaces. It is not all just what gets you off, as the fetish theory folks say, it is about how you feel in a variety of ways.

This is the problem within the larger community... always someone trying to say the other guy is just a pervert, so everyone ends up with strange stilted discussions and scrolling through reams of fiction and captions to find the few things that match their experience or desires alone.

-Anonymous

You're right, I should not be specifying Cross dreamers. Thanks for bringing this up, and I apologize.

However, I don't think it is fair to say it is a small number of cross dreamers that are pushing negative and damaging autogynephilia theories. I don't have specific numbers but the reason I tagged cross dreaming in the transphobia post, albeit unfairly as you pointed out, was because it seems very common that the two are connected.

I've read comments from cross dreamers that they feel marginalized by others in the transgender community. I think there is a lot of internal fighting going on even in the larger LGBT community, and none of it is helpful. That said, I hardly think cross dreamers are marginalized any more by transsexuals than they marginalize transsexuals. Transphobia is so deeply internalized in the cross dreamer community that they do not recognize how damaging and unacceptable it is to fetishize becoming a “real girl” and then place negative value-judgements on, insult, and attempt to  censor and ostracize “that shemale stuff”.

That shemale stuff is so gay.

The absolute best example I can give, that might exist on the internet is TF-Media, and the vast majority of its fans, contributors, and captioners. The old site is dead, but a new blog has risen, and there are so many bloggers out there that are part of this deeply transphobic and almost entirely cross dreaming gang. I was there very briefly, and my content was summarily rejected by the site administrator EXPLICITELY for being gay. Gay. Transgender issues, to TF-Media and EVERY SINGLE SUPPORTOR BY EXTENTION... are gay. 

This is autogynephilia. 

This is transphobia. 

This is cross dreamers. 

You’ll hear lots of applause for TF-Media, and that’s applause from transphobic people. They don’t think they are, but they are.

If you want other examples, look to the sites I mentioned before: havens, sanctuaries, and a whole lot of confessions on blogs. This is the cross dreaming community, and this is where transphobic remarks are found, and this is not generally where transgender content is accepted.

So you are correct, not all cross dreamers are transphobic. Too many are.