References

I didn't get the first opportunity. That went to my teammate. His last day is next Friday and while I'm very very happy for him (he totally deserves a better life) I'm also wincing at what I know will be a torrent of workload that rolls down onto the remaining team mates. This company SUCKS at leadership.

The second opportunity seems out of reach. This is especially distressing because I'm perfect for it and, more importantly, it is my client! I already know their system, they are in my town, they know me, know I'm trans, and they seem to like me. I don't think they even got my resume, though. I'll try to find out who to contact about it and hand it directly to them. This recruiter doesn't have my interests at heart.

Which brings me to the subject at hand: recruiters and references. I have neither.

I have been largely unable to get any of my radio and TV references, people who were good friends and would go to bat for me, to even reply to my messages or return my calls. They haven't talked to me since I transitioned.

Recruiters make their living on reputation. Their clients (prospective employers) need to feel like the recruiter is reliable, takes their needs seriously, and can deliver quality applicants. What I've now been discovering after a half dozen recruiters just vanish on me is that nobody wants to have their client question their reputation and quality with a line like "Hey, what's all this about sending us a tranny??" It extends to an unwillingness by many (but not all) colleagues to vouche for me.

So now I'm going to be canvassing my clients websites directly and firing off resumes myself. Who needs recruiters or references!

Oh shit.

Well at least I'm learning new things about the wonderful challenges of being trans and alive.

Can you tell I'm actively trying not to depress everyone with how completely fucking miserable I am? I hope so. I'm biting my tongue so hard it bleeds.