Friday, November 25, 2011

Sex Stories

I've always really enjoyed reading erotica. My first forays into sexuality and sexual imagination were on and surrounded mind control.

While the Erotic Mind Control Story Archive has taken a transphobic approach regarding content, I continue to visit because there are a lot of yummy stories there.

I have written a few stories myself. They are designed to be short snapshots of a situation that may have an earlier beginning or a later end. I have no plans to continue these stories, but they certainly are open enough to be continued.

I enjoy turning out, as I've said before, so these stories deal with the changing of a person's sexuality by a more persuasive person. A concept I find delicious.

I am including the links to the stories from Nifty's story archive. I feel Nifty's site is one of the more inclusive erotica sites out there and I want to support that. Sadly it is text without style sheet.

Thursday, November 24, 2011

I'm Going Through Changes

The Almighty Estrogen is having its way with me at an alarming and unexpected rate.

To confirm: I take two pumps of Estrogel in the morning, along with 200mg Spironolactone.

A tube of Estrogel lasts one month. I finished my first and so let's discuss One month results using pictures of the my truest heroes, the utterly fabulous Jessica Fox.

I typically pump onto each inner thigh and rub in, but I have begun alternating with my abdomen as well because as the season changes, dry skin must be avoided.

My face is fuller, rounder, softer features. I have a significant reduction in growth time for facial hair. I was told Estrogen does not have an effect on facial hair growth. I am surprised. I am being told how I look different, but people cannot place it. Those who know can tell outright my face has softened.

Body hair in other places has also had a significant reduction in regrowth and is sporadically not regrowing in areas, for example the arms. Leg hair has almost entirely given up growing at all. Luckily I keep smooth otherwise I'd look quite odd. While I have been doing laser hair removal, I have not done anywhere except the Brazilian/bikini area so this is Estrogen and Spiro talking.

The hair on my head has thickened, become silkier, and is growing at a faster rate. Okay seriously what is going on here? We've all read countless articles stating Queen E won't affect facial hair or the hair on your head. I have a blood test this week so we shall see what is up, but I like to think I'm soaking up hormones like flowers do sunshine because it is my destiny.

The pores of my skin have reduced, my complexion is even smoother, and my skin softer. I am not yet susceptible to heat and cold, as far as I can tell.

People smell different. I find myself.. catching a masculine scent in the air that seems quite noticeable but I ask others and nobody notices. Maybe it is in my head...

My itsy bitsy spider doesn't run up any water spouts now. She is very difficult to get hard despite lovely and overwhelming arousal and she is just lazy omg. I have to work so hard to keep her hard. This is all in the interest of science of course! Ladies and Gentlemen, I can assure you:I don't pitch I catch.

The moment I'm sure you've all been waiting for, which is why I left it until now... Mama Mei's nipples are WAY sensitive. Like ow easily and Ooh la la even easier! Also, my cleavage is deeper. This is, as far as I have read, unusual for one month into the big E.

Thanks Jessica Fox for being fabulous and helping me with this Estrogen update.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Plastic Plans

I had an amazing time with the Doctor on Tuesday. They were kind and patient and embraced my uniqueness. They are excited to work with me, and they are excited to be a part of my documentary.

The Doctor helped me understand the various methods and options I have available for plastic surgery and feminization and together we prioritized a plan.

I was very pleased with their honest praise regarding parts of me that did not require modification, my nose as one example, and I am uplifted by the plan we have.

Five hours of surgery on one day and I'll be living full time. That isn't to say I won't want additional procedures later, but this will put me in a position to flip the switch and be the ladyboy I am, in public.

Brow lift, breast implants, lipo and a tummy tuck, and injections in my chin, cheeks, and lips will be the procedures that take place in that day.

Males have lower brows than females, and so in order to capitalize on my Asian looking eyes and have a more feminine face that does not make putting on eye shadow both a chore and a waste, a brow lift will happen. Five tiny incisions at my hair line on my forehead will pave the way for the endoscopic procedure. Endoscopic surgery is that terrifying snake tube with the camera on it.

Biodegradable anchors will be placed on the front of my skull and the brow will be lifted and hinged onto the anchors like we might hang a coat. The healing process finds the anchors vanishing after the flesh has re-adhered to the skull.

Because my skin is tight, 40D breasts are not an option immediately. The Doctor would do a healthy C cup for me right away, but he believes the Becker method will be a better choice. Becker implants are inflatable.

330ml of saline/silicon implants are installed. A small tube is under the skin at the arm pit and is used to inject additional liquid into the implant every few days or weeks. This process allows the skin time to gracefully expand until the full 550ml D cup breasts I want are achieved.

Liposuction is straight forward. In order to avoid the lumpiness of regaining weight we used to hear about in the 90s and early 2000s, Doctors now criss cross a latticework to evenly remove fat.

The tummy tuck is what is really special. An expensive procedure on it's own, the tummy tuck will be the forerunner for giving a feminine shape. The abdominal muscles are cut in the center and in beneath, in addition to a tuck in and south, the muscles are stitched together in a tighter fashion on the sides, which pulls the flanks inwards and provides the shapeliness of the hourglass.

The injections to cheek, lips, and chin add fullness and, in the case of the chin, fills in the cleft.

The total for these procedures will be $23000 CDN after taxes. Financing is available, but who knows if I qualify. Still, I feel uplifted by the prospect of being lady fabulous close at hand.

I do want to have hip and buttocks enhancement, but the Doctor said that doing a turn in the middle of surgery makes things more complicated and costs a lot more. I will return for those procedures afterwards as they do not prevent me from living full time and they, above all others, hormones will affect.

Plus he says my bum is already good.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

I am so very Lucky

As I progress with estrogen and anti androgens, and get the chance to dress more frequently, to acquire the clothes and shoes and accessories I desire, to express myself with the hairstyles and makeup that I feel represent me, I find myself increasingly happy.

I'm in a miserable relationship, trapped in a place with no privacy, drowned with two jobs just to pay off my partner's credit card debt. I have zero savings and without financing my documentary cannot be produced. Yet I am still making the right choice.

Perhaps I'm not living as myself every day yet, but I am so very very lucky to be a ladyboy, shemale, transwoman, t-girl, sissy, etc. I am so very lucky to be me.

I have read from many t-girls that they wish they could stop, that they could be what society expects them to be, but they can't. I can't either. We R who We R. I heart Ke$ha.

I don't feel that way. I never have. Regardless of how bad things may get, I am blessed, not cursed, to be third gender, katoey, newhalf. Shemale. Proud.

I made a few captions to illustrate the point. Gallery found here.

Monday, November 21, 2011

Consulting Plastic

Nov 22 I have a consultation with another plastic surgeon I met at the Everything to do with Sex show.

Previously I had met a plastic surgeon who had suggested a number of procedures for my face that would total 30 000.

This new Doctor said he wouldnt' touch a lot of my face, and instead we'd focus on brow and jaw. That sounds more financially reasonable.

In addition he said it is likely he could do face and body in one day, he will do 6-7 hours of surgery at a time.

I'm very excited, despite the cost, because he has financing options available and, most importantly, he seems more interested in my documentary, which ought to give me a bargaining chip.

Sunday, November 20, 2011


My life became so hectic after Halloween that I really hadn't had a chance to sit down and contemplate what happened and explain to you.

I went dressed as Rainbow Brite to the Bovine Sex Club on Halloween with my friends. It was fun, I danced so much my legs hurt for an entire week. I've never felt so free to dance before.

We ordered cosmopolitans, and since we were in a rock club we got dirty looks from the bartenders every time we did, but they were joking and super nice.

I had women coming out of the crowd to get my attention and congratulate me on my costume. Three times the women were then spooked to realize I was a ladyboy.

Despite the compliments I did not receive much attention from boys. It would be easy for me to feel lower self esteem but honestly it wasn't about me. I got tons of positive looks, I would catch them staring at my legs and checking me out, but they never made their moves.

Then I realized, boys are cowards. They suffer from overwhelming peer pressure. Men don't huge, they don't wear certain colours, they don't use words like fabulous and they don't pursue any potentially homoerotic situations while surrounded by their rock and roll buddies.

I had guys approach me and then as soon as they realized I was a ladyboy they honestly jaw-dropped and backed away.

Next time I'll skip the rock and roll, and just go straight to the shemale sex club, Goodhandy's.

It surprises me that boys will let a tiny little thing between my legs keep them from a good time.

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Shemale Dick Patrol

Miss Anonymous asks:

I want to get a dildo with a suction cup for training purposes. I have been using skinny broom sticks for practice. They are about 3/4" wide. I can get about 7 or almost 8" in without too much discomfort. What length and width and color should I get? Is there anything else I need to know about buying a dildo, except not to have a nervous breakdown at the adult bookstore when I am standing at the counter asking for what I want?

That's a great question. When I was at the Everything to do with Sex show, this was exactly what we discussed.

I recommend a cyberskin dong, they look and feel realistic. When you store it, cover it in corn starch powder and keep it in a separate bag than your other toys.

You'll be standing there whimpering, trying to decide dark and white meat. In my experience, the sales girls love watching the dilemma unfold and, again in my experience, they are amused when you bring a gorgeous black toy to cash with a blush.

I'm also a fan of balls. I want to feel them press against me as I take Mr. Toy deep.

You can also get vibrating options in some of the dongs, with different speeds or, in the case of my friend who I am so jealous of... intermittent and random buzzing pulses.

Don't be a hero and get a mammoth dong your first time out. These 6-7 inches look incredible.

Have fun with the experience: the fear, the shame, the choices, the positive salesgirls, and the outcome.

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