Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Doctor Referral

So I may be taking a needle like a good girl as early as January! My Doctor is referring me to one of the endocrinologists in the city, and it turns out I'm not even my Doctor's first transgender patient! Super!

He says specialists are often busy, but if I haven't gotten an appointment by January I should call them directly and make this happen!

I'm so excited!

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Lesbian Hypnosis Part 1

I deeply enjoy "turning out" It doesn't matter if its white going black, bois going sissy, or straight going gay, it makes me feel soOOOo good.

I certainly haven't met a woman who can melt me, but I totally adore the idea of straight girls going lesbian, forgetting what their boyfriends were ever for. So hot!

I really enjoyed making those motivational captions before, so I thought I'd make a series devoted to straight girls turning lesbian.


Lesbian Hypnosis Part 2

I had a boyfriend?

Friday, December 10, 2010

Holiday Celebrations

A recurring bliss for me is the idea of being on display, putting on a show. I fancy myself creative, and to that end I would love to be living art at a party of the wealthy and influential.

Standing on a pedestal, shimmering with body glittery and thick coating of oil, tangled in a mess of fabulous Christmas lights.

So many rich hands on me, women and men, giving soft caresses, inspecting the art, placing their bids. Perhaps a gorgeous Adonis is brought out to mate roughly with my Christmas pixie ass.

Slutfucked by an alpha at a crowded event is a wonderful way to celebrate the season! Happy Holidays everyone!

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Hypnosis sticky sweet

It is no surprise from my captions that I've been a huge mind control fan for some time. What I melt for is the confidence of a person, male or female, and how brilliant and charismatic they can be to change my mind. You can change so much with the right tone of voice, the right brush of fingers across a cheek, the right words and swagger.

New and sexy ideas can drip like syrup on a pancake brain with the help of stylish headphones. In no time you're loyal to a totally different crowd, shaking that ass while you listen to your sonic spell and think about how pretty you'll be with your knees to the ground.

Memories can be deconstructed so that first kiss with Lucy Sanders becomes hot and steamy shower kiss with your teammate, and that playboy magazine you keep under your bed becomes a big gorgeous dildo and a men's health, the perfect preteen date!

A straight girl could abandon her beloved boyfriend and all that she knew, succumbing to forbidden lesbian delights.

Or of course a curious boy could be convinced by conversation that he was never really a boy and live as a girl, give it a try... just for awhile...

I've just joined a place called mcgarden, and its been a total blast. Thanks to Nomdefemme for encouraging me to sign up, these peeps are great!

Sunday, December 5, 2010

no!no! make mei smooth!

Omg guys I found something soooo fabulous that I just totally have to have! The no!no! hair removal system is closest thing to laser for permanent hair removal. Isn`t that fabulous?!

I've done lots of research and this so works, and I want it omg omg, but how come Canadian stores aren't selling it yet?

Oh my won't some dashing suitor spend his hard earned money to make Mei happy! I surely know one of you will. ^_^

This will make me smooth and smooth makes me happy! My friends will want to touch my skin and men will want to kiss my body. I know you like it when men touch me, when they feel me up and play with my little star. I know you want my sistas to finger my pie and have little lesbian joys with me. I know you want me to model for you, my legs so bare and silky.

It's so easy, no!no! has the solution, and pretty in pink would look so nice under my gay little Christmas tree! Its on my wish list at the bottom of my blog, where all the cutest things are!

Friday, December 3, 2010

Fantasy ramblings

I was playing through my folders the other day and found something I wrote about some fantasy concepts that really touch me in my boipussy...

I made a few captions once about being digital. I feel kinda like a digital playground anyways, so colourful streaming code meant to entertain men like you. I think that it would be amazing to be digitized, my mid floating in a virtual world, where I can be affected and altered like open source code. My environment, my body, even my personality can be altered to suit someone’s fantasies.Perhaps then, with my body laid here, I am downloaded into another person’s body across the ocean or something, and live as me 2.0 in pretty form.

I love idea of being bath girl, and perhaps living in a warm bath of milk or water like a water nymph, waiting for my Master to arrive in his bathhouse so I can sponge bath and massage him.Be a relaxation technique for a ruler in a decadent world. I think that the bath itself would transform me, so I could be lured there by promise of a hedonistic vacation usually reserved for Emperors, and end up transformed into the vacation for rulers myself.

I want to be a happy product for a corporation. It would be nice to be headhunted by a company for my skills and brought overseas, so exciting, only to be transformed through company therapy, education, electricity, and health/surgery checkups into a model or product to tot their wares. My imagination is valuable, but doesn’t require my gender, I would be valuable sexual product with such creativity.

I read a story once where a convincing man showed up and just talked to a family at a garage sale. He left and came back a few times, but I can imagine my parents being convinced to sell me for omg like so little money at a garage sale, to this man. They would be appalled at first, but calmly convinced, and his words would change their minds and mine, making me more of a sissy until I’m a girl and then making me a product for him to purchase.

Philosophy is an interesting concept. The idea that someone can come to know something through conversation is so fascinating. I think it would be so sexy if someone was able to convince me of the way the universe works, and as he does, the universe changes to suit what he’s said. My mind, my body, my purpose, my whole existence can be explained in such a way that it just becomes so, and I am so lucky to learn how the universe works!

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Size Queen

It comes as no surprise that I'm very attracted to men, and of course a certain reverence for cocks goes with the territory. Sure, I love a man's big hands, his voice, his smell, and his chest and abs, his everything, but there is something instinctively religious about succumbing to the will of a big swinging dick.

The cock is such a thing of beauty, its personality is unique to the male. Veins, thickness, textures, cut or uncut, there is just so much that makes a man's cock "His" and dicks are so beautiful it makes me want them inside me soOOo bad!

Cock is cock, but what I wish I understood about myself is why I find myself instinctively drawn to BIG dicks. I mean big, heavy, slut taming dongs. I want to feel the weight on my face, I want to work to get that godstick down my throat, and I want to touch heaven when the fullness overwhelms me and the men who have em know it! They know I can't help myself around a hung male, I just gotta suck him and fawn over him and get my tight little boipussy ruled by him.

They say cocks can be too big, why can't I agree with that!?

A science guy told me about how ladyboys were designed for big dicks, cause our asspussies are longer inside and can accomodate big swinging breeders where girls can't. I know hung men so often have self esteem issues because stupid girls complain about their size and the pain. Doesn't it just seem so perfectly natural, then, that shemales and hung men were born to be mated together?!
So here's to all you hung men out there, I love you long time!

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Yummy Mummy!

That's right the baby is born! I'm a yummy mummy now, soon to be pushing my stroller around and getting all the looks from the boys on the street.

I'm super excited because my daughter is soOo cute! I'm so going to impart all my fashion ideas and teach her how to get all the attention from the boys!

Don't worry boys, having my baby has only made me even needier sexually! I don't know what it is, but being a MILF now just has set me on fire, I want all of you to fuck me in one endless gangbang I want to breed so bad, cum in me and maybe if enough big strong men fuck me senseless I'll actually get knocked up!

Girls! Is it just me, or does the idea of being a MILF like me get you excited?

100 000 lovers

I'm so proud! Last night my imagefap profile went over 100 thousand views! I am so grateful for all of you who have had such sweet orgasms to my ideas. I like it when you get off on my mind. Cum splashes on my brain so often.

Friday, November 19, 2010

Gender Clinic: Results

Can't avoid the cliche.. it has been awhile. Wow lots happened. I'll update over time. Let's discuss the gender clinic first, kay?

I had my gender clinic evaluations and got a big sparkly stamp of "GENDER DYSPHORIA" approval. It feels pretty good, to be confirmed, validated.

That is all the gender clinic can offer. I was thinking about it. Being Canadian, I've grown up with the idea that if something is going on, you go to the appropriate organizational body and they help you through it. Being transgender doesn't work that way. It should, but it doesn't. The gender clinic stated, peacefully and supportively, that this is up to me, I am on my own.

When to take HRT, what to take, if to take it at all, the surgeries, everything except for SRS is up to me. I need no permission.

I'm being referred to an endocronologist and they can help me begin this journey. The problem, of course, is cost. I don't have a solution for that yet.

Enjoy some tasty shemale treats, oui?

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Sporting Life

I never was much of a sporty person. I find most sports games boring, though oddly I like the idea of making snacks and serving drinks to the guys while they watch the game.

Luckily not being sporty has helped me have a soft body which makes it easier to pass! Super!

Saturday, October 23, 2010


So while I fidget to get comfy on long wait lists for tg support programs, counselling, and TG experienced physicians, I have a small bit of movement from my current Doctor.

I had the HRT protocols for him, but he's opting instead to refer me to an endocrinologist instead. I suppose I wanted him to say he'd take this adventure on himself, but it makes way better sense to have the professional hormone magicians sparkle dust over me instead.

Regardless, I can't afford it yet. I wonder if a "donate" button would be a good idea for my blog...

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Pornstar Vanity Interview

Vanity is an inspiration, and I was overjoyed to find this interview with her. If anyone has interviews with other transsexual pornstars I would very much like to watch them.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Feminine Voice Training

Hiyas people!

So on my quest to become a fabulous shemale pornstar there many facets of femininity that I have to drown in. Since it is my thoughts and words that make you gorgeous men feel sooO good you want to sneak me around your girlfriends backs and buy me things, that is something I want to focus really hard on!

Now I'm very blessed to have been a chatty child, and practiced silly voices often. I have several years experience in voice work and radio production, so I understand the basics of making my voice feminine without help. That doesn't change the fact I have to practice practice practice just as much as all of you girls.

Now I've included a few videos below, but I'll go through the basics with you here.

1. Reach for falsetto, not to stay at falsetto, but to learn to speak without resonance.
2. Think about how you want to sound, bimbo or not.. find your own unique voice.
3. Practice. You'll want to use a voice recorder to play it back to yourself.

Now you don't have to buy a fancy recorder, and honestly most smartphones can download apps of voice recording, and most mp3 players have that function. Because I work in sound production already, I have a Zoom Handy Recorder H4n. Very overkill.

CandiFLA is a great resource on youtube for how to train your voice to be feminine. When I found her, thanks to Megan, I was absolutely shocked at how much like me she is. She is very much my end goal for physical appearance, but also she has humour, confidence, and flirtatiousness that I share. One of the most interesting aspects about Candi is that she reverts to male voice frequently. That is very rare, and special, since it shows how deep voiced males can acheive feminine voices despite their starting points.

The following are some of her videos on voice training:

For me, it is very difficult to practice without privacy. My gf is on maternity leave, she is always here, always asking me what I'm doing, always in the same room. I will take my recorder and go outside, but then I'm doing it outside. I'm not sure what a good option is, but I have to find one, if I am to sound feminine when I dress as a woman, for Halloween...

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Caught! Without support

I'm having a really hard time getting the guidance I need to pursue my transformation. Wait lists abound. 9 month wait list here, 1.5 year wait list there, 3 months is so far the fastest. In the meantime, I've been given a list of Hormone Replacement Therapy protocols to provide to my Doctor. If he is up for the quest, he'll prescribe them himself, if not, I've also been given a list of endocrinologists he can refer me to.

It is progress, but it is slow.

I have been having a hard time of it, mostly the continued stress put on my common law partner. She finds my nail polish and it is amusing, she sees me putting it on, and she cries for 24 hours. She finds my dress and its amusing, but I shudder to think how long she would cry if she saw me wearing it.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Cum makes you happy!

I was overjoyed to read that getting our boipussies full of cum will help us be docile and happy! I look forward to creampie relaxation techniques! Thanks to Orva for finding this tidbit for me!

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Ladyboy tush

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